Erotic jokes
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Looking for a place to have fun? Congrats! You have just found it!
This is the less serious part of this forum! ‘Erotic jokes’ is the place where you can post jokes you want to share with us or any other funny things!
This might get you giggling so be careful!
Let the fun begin!
Guys, did you know this one?
The manager hired a new secretary. She was young, sweet, and polite. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open.
While leaving the room, she courteously said, “Oh sir, did you know that your barracks door was open.”
He did not understand her remark, but later on happened to look down and saw that his zipper was open.
He decided to have some fun with his new employee. Calling her in, he asked, “By the way, Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door open this morning, did you also see a soldier standing at attention.”
The secretary, who was quite witty, replied, “Why, no sir, all I saw was a little disabled veteran, sitting on two duffel bags!”I know a very good one… it’s a little bit shorter but it’s funny as hell:
The teacher asked Jimmy, ‘Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?’ Jimmy replied crying, “Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, ‘I am going to eat that p*ssy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'”
PS: A good one Jane 😉
Q: What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?
A: Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!Q: Why do women like to have sex with the lights off?
A: They can’t stand to see a man have a good time!Q: What did the penis say to the condom?
A: Cover me I’m going in!Take this one :))))
A man and a woman were having drinks when they got into an argument about who enjoyed sex more.
The man said, ‘Men obviously enjoy sex more than women. Why do you think we’re so obsessed with getting laid?’
‘That doesn’t prove anything,” the woman countered. ‘Think about this: when your ear itches and you put your finger in it and wiggle it around, then pull it out, which feels better: your ear or your finger?’I’m still laughing :))
=)))
In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing young girl. The four passengers join in conversation, which very soon turns to the erotic. Then, the young girl proposes, “If each of you will give me $1.00, I will show you my legs.”
The men, charmed by this young girl, all pull a buck out of their wallet. And then the girl pulls up her dress a bit to show her legs. Then she says, “If each of you gentlemen will give me $10.00, I’ll show you my thighs,”.And men being what they are, they all pull out a ten dollar bill. The girl pulls up her dress all the way to her legs in full. The conversation continues, and the men, a bit excited, have all taken off their coats. Then the young girl says, “If you will give me $100, I will show you where I was operated on for appendicitis.”
All three fork over the money. The girl then turned to the window and points outside at a building they’re passing. “See there in the distance. That’s the hospital where I had it done!”=)))) Very funny guys! I really like this topic! It makes my day!
Here’s one:
A girl realized that she had grown hair between her legs. She got worried and asked her mom about that hair.
Her mom calmly said, ‘That part where the hair has grown is called Monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair.’ …. The girl smiled.
At dinner, she told her sister, ‘My monkey has grown hair.’
Her sister smiled and said, ‘That’s nothing, mine is already eating bananas.’
It’s time for some more..:))) Nice one Simone!
Girl: Baby I am wet.
Boy: Want a paper towel?
Girl: No, I want more than that 🙂
Boy: Want 2 paper towels?
Girl: No, baby I want something big and round 🙂
Boy: Damn you want the whole roll?You think you know them all? Read this one! I’ve read it yesterday and I’m still laughing right now:)))
A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, “My penis,” and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, “Error. Not long enough.” =)))))))))
Hello! I’m new on this forum! I love your jokes guys… This is what had attracted me here..
Hope you like mine too..
My girl caught me blowing my dick with the air dryer, and asked what I was doing? Apparently “heating your dinner” wasn’t a good answer.
🙂
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